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UCLA study examines how outside stressors affect family relationships

A common theme of this blog is that much of who we are and what we do can be traced back to the quality of our family relationships. Positive, supportive family relationships contribute to our well-being in countless ways—while negative, abusive ones can be deadly. Most parents would love to give their children the best possible environment in which to develop physically and emotionally: they understand that it's not only the immediate <a title="Building Resilience" target="_blank" href="http://www.vision.org/visionmedia/article.aspx?id=5816">well-being of children</a> that is at stake, but their future well-being—and that of the wider community as well. But however ardently parents may hope to ensure that positive environment, it isn't always easy for them to do so. In Western society it is increasingly necessary for families to have two wage earners, and school, extracurricular activities and other obligations also encroach. Could there be an effect on family interaction as a result? If so, how? This was essentially the question explored by <a title="Rena Repetti UCLA" target="_blank" href="http://www.psych.ucla.edu/faculty/faculty_page?id=32&area=11">Rena Repetti</a> and her colleagues at the University of California, Los Angeles, in a peer reviewed study published in the April 2009 issue of Current Directions in Psychological Science.  "The family is popularly imagined as a stable haven, a place where individuals come together to recuperate from the ups and downs of the outside world," wrote the researchers. "But the family has ups and downs of its own; it is a dynamic system, not impermeable to outside influences but porous and continually in flux. For example, parents' job schedules and children's homework shape family time, activities, and routines. Other effects of work and school on the family are less overt."  Certainly, as the researchers explain, we may continue to react to a particular stressor long after the event has occurred. As a result, we may continue to nurse our wounds after returning home. How does the fallout affect our family relationships? "We have found that, following more stressful days at work, spouses and parents adjust their social behavior at home in two ways. One common pattern is an overall reduction in social engagement and expression of emotion," says the report. In a series of studies, Repetti and her colleagues found that mothers as well as fathers withdrew emotionally and disengaged socially from their children after stressful or exceptionally demanding work days, and spouses "were more distracted and less responsive" toward one another. Children also showed lingering reactions to school stress. Both elementary-school-age children and teens initiated more conflict with other family members after a day characterized by problems in academics or with peers. "A second short-term response to job stress resembles the stereotypic image of an agitated employee kicking his dog after an argument with his boss," write the researchers. This plays out as "an increase in irritability and displays of anger with both spouse and children."  Ripetti and her colleagues note that this second pattern usually occurs in a particular subset of people: particularly those with a history of psychological distress. How harmful is all this take-home stress in the long run? It depends. If the short-term effects are allowed to build up over time, there may be more lasting effects. Especially within families with high levels of conflict, or where one or more family members have a history of depression and anxiety. We do know from other studies explored in this blog that family support and parental engagement are crucial to the well-being of children, so if our coping style in reaction to stress at work involves withdrawing from our families at home, it can't be good over the long haul. As difficult as it may be to push ourselves out of our comfort zone, <a title="building resilience to stress" target="_blank" href="http://www.vision.org/visionmedia/article.aspx?id=5816">resilience</a> experts suggest that connecting rather than withdrawing is our best bet for handling stress. Rapetti's research is fascinating and important in several respects: but perhaps the most important thing parents can take home from this study is a new awareness of what they may be bringing home to their children at the end of their work day. 10 application/xml false children emotional development children families and children job and family psychology children research family resilience research social relationships stress child stress children Mozilla/4.0 (compatible; MSIE 7.0; Windows NT 5.1; Trident/4.0; GTB5; .NET CLR 1.1.4322; .NET CLR 2.0.50727; InfoPath.1) 127.0.0.1 127.0.0.1 gstepp 66.125.198.98 false true false false true 191587 false false true false false false true 234368 Resource 191587 173239 190808 1244244603604 1244245238999 Controlled RE: Bringing It All Back Home

I have to admit that I find myself actively trying to reduce the amount of stress on my family.  We're always restricting how many activities the kids can sign up for, especially if it's a big homework year.  We know a lot of families that are stressed to the max between work and heading to a string of activities that are supposed to be "fun." 10 application/xml false Mozilla/5.0 (Windows; U; Windows NT 6.0; en-US; rv:1.9.0.10) Gecko/2009042316 Firefox/3.0.10 127.0.0.1 127.0.0.1 24.4.5.174 false true false false true 234375 Resource 191587 173239 190808 1244268367208 1244301315046 Controlled RE: Bringing It All Back Home

This is my first time visit here. I see this blog is a pro blog :) Great content and great template here. Great!   10 application/xml false Mozilla/5.0 (Windows; U; Windows NT 5.1; en-US; rv:1.8.1.20) Gecko/20081217 Firefox/2.0.0.20 127.0.0.1 127.0.0.1 118.137.210.157 false true false false true 234611 Resource 191587 173239 190808 1244737284304 1244737958305 Controlled RE: Bringing It All Back Home

I think this applies to my family more than we would like to admit. We are currently trying to save our marriage so need to find a way to undo our bad habits. 10 application/xml false Mozilla/4.0 (compatible; MSIE 7.0; Windows NT 6.0; SU 3.21; GTB6; SLCC1; .NET CLR 2.0.50727; Media Center PC 5.0; .NET CLR 3.5.30729; .NET CLR 3.0.30618) 127.0.0.1 127.0.0.1 97.115.59.232 false true false false true 234617 Resource 191587 173239 190808 1244743486067 1244745115907 Controlled RE: Bringing It All Back Home

I thought this was a very informative and timely post, especially for me. I find myself dealing with stress away from home by shutting down. I try to avoid bringing any of that inside the home, but I didn't realize that in my shutting down, I was actually still bringing it in. It's something I need to work. Great post! 10 application/xml false Mozilla/5.0 (Windows; U; Windows NT 5.1; en-US; rv:1.9.0.10) Gecko/2009042316 Firefox/3.0.10 127.0.0.1 127.0.0.1 209.63.134.99 false true false false true 234633 Resource 191587 173239 190808 1244757127939 1244758013078 Controlled RE: Bringing It All Back Home

Yeah, I agree with Mr. Nichols. Very timely post indeed!  I just blogged about bringing all my own personal stress into my relationship.  Life is a work in progress, though. 10 application/xml false Mozilla/5.0 (Macintosh; U; PPC Mac OS X 10.4; en-US; rv:1.9.0.10) Gecko/2009042315 Firefox/3.0.10 127.0.0.1 127.0.0.1 24.13.108.236 false true false false true 235125 Resource 191587 173239 190808 1245469420911 1245471716044 Controlled RE: Bringing It All Back Home

I certainly fall prey to the former. This post serves as a poignant reminder to push beyond my comfort zone for a hubby that's more than worth the effort. Thank you.  10 application/xml false Mozilla/5.0 (Macintosh; U; Intel Mac OS X 10.5; en-US; rv:1.9.0.11) Gecko/2009060214 Firefox/3.0.11 127.0.0.1 127.0.0.1 75.166.48.221 false true false false true 235977 Resource 191587 173239 190808 1247284632530 1247287659991 Controlled RE: Bringing It All Back Home

I also have to say that trying to hide a lot of stress from your family can have a damaging effect, too.  Kids sense when things aren't right.  Nevertheless, this post seems timely.  I'm very stressed these days and I know it's having an effect on my relationship, but I'm trying very hard to reduce it by doing other things: walking, talking, or writing!   10 application/xml false Mozilla/5.0 (Macintosh; U; PPC Mac OS X 10.4; en-US; rv:1.9.0.11) Gecko/2009060214 Firefox/3.0.11 127.0.0.1 127.0.0.1 24.13.108.236 false true false false true 238678 Resource 191587 173239 190808 1251690091794 1251694745909 Controlled RE: Bringing It All Back Home

i think it is very much important that kids are brought up in a good manner and for this there has to be a good environment around and the money matters also have to be safe enough to give the children a secured life and lifestyle 10 application/xml false Mozilla/5.0 (Windows; U; Windows NT 6.0; en-US; rv:1.9.1.2) Gecko/20090729 Firefox/3.5.2 (.NET CLR 3.5.30729) 127.0.0.1 127.0.0.1 122.167.118.61 false true false false true 190283 blog blogsite/FamilyMatters/web